Thursday, 7 June 2007


Hmmmm…. What else? Oh, yeah, interviews! Man they are testing me! I’ve never really failed at something. If I have, I’ve always made the changes and fixed it. These interviews are pushing me to my limits and I’m learning new stuff about myself as a result. I suppose I’ve never had to work hard for anything before – well now it seems like I’m working for everything – relationship, career, climbing, fitness, friendships – the one thing that keeps having to suffer for all these things is me – but that’s the thing that also gains so I guess it works out like a trade in or upgrade – I swap a piece of the old me for a new enriched me! Anyway – been on 3 full day interviews – came second choice in all of them with glowing feedback and essentially being told I gave a perfect lesson, provided a great role model both on paper and in person and aced all the interviews! The first one I lost to a local welsh speaker who knew half the staff of the school (… do I hear banjos?)… the second one came down to a split decision among the panel and they gave it to a friend of mine from my course (Linda) –basically I didn’t have the ovaries! It was comic though – I got a debrief from the deputy head that took over an hour – first thing he said was – I wanted you!…. the most recent one was in a nice school but I had been warned that they were looking for someone to handle the worse sets in the equivalent of Irish 4th, 5th and 6th year! They appointed a woman with 8 years experience – a real mean machine – that’s just not my style – again feedback was “you’re a great teacher but we don’t need a great teacher for THIS vacancy, we need crowd control”… Needless to say I’m getting fed up with having to explain to people that I’m a failure but the interviewers tell me I did nothing wrong and I’ve nothing to improve on. Slightly frustrating would be an understatement!

Luckily for what remains of my sanity I happen to think everything happens for a reason – only after the last one, driving home, thinking about paying bills etc… I realized – I’ve never had to work like this for anything – this isn’t coming easy! I’m adapting, learning and I’m gong to apply this and more to my climbing. I got home in a grand humour and the freaky thing is, the next day – two positions popped into existence in my IDEAL two schools! They’re both in Wales and they are where I have always wanted to teach over here – I’ve not got them yet but it just highlighted that things can seem so futile when stuck in the middle of them at the moment things are happening but ultimately there’s a point to it all and plenty to learn along the way too.

Sad and hippy – possibly

… but it’s keeping me going for now and I like it!

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